Biased and Faulty: “Ponyville Confidential” review

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The thing about journalism is that it has become kinda shitty in recent years. “If it bleeds, it leads,” is the new adage among many newsrooms, and this has caused many people to either ignore these morons, or take them seriously, and I’m not sure what’s worse.

The role of journalists is to report the truth in the most honest and even-handed way possible. To be fair and accurate, as my old journalism professor put it so many times. Unfortunately, that doesn’t really sell papers, or get ratings, or page hits. Fear, controversy and rage are what get people’s attention, and so that’s what editors tend to push to the front page.

You ever see Moonlight? It premiered a few years ago and only lasted half a season, so it’s okay if you didn’t. Anyway, one of the characters was a reporter for a website called BuzzWire, and when her editor is murdered by a vampire, her replacement says his top priority is getting the story out before anyone else. So, forget fact checking, if it’s wrong they can print a retraction later. What a cunt! This is not the way to do business! At least not ethically!

There was a time when journalism wasn’t about the money, it was about doing the right thing. A company would gain money from other sources and use the profits to fund a media outlet that wasn’t necessarily designed to make a profit. But in recent years, it’s something the shareholders frown upon.

With all that in mind, we move to the latest episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, as the Cutie Mark Crusaders try their hoof at journalism, and learn these ethical principles the hard way. Continue reading →

Fluttershy and the Waves: “Hurricane Fluttershy” review

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Equestria is an unusual place. I mean excluding the whole ‘sentient ponies’ and ‘living mythological creatures’ thing. What I mean is, it’s unusual because of the jobs certain ponies have. Specifically, the jobs inherently connected to their race.

Now, earth ponies are in charge of managing the animal and plant life in Equestria. Which makes sense to a certain extent, I mean, here on Planet Earth, we have farmers, and pet owners. But generally they don’t bother taking care of wild animal and plant life, because those can take care of themselves.

Unicorns are in charge of raising the sun and moon every day. I wonder when the others pony races are going to clue in that the planets orbit naturally, and if they didn’t, the moon would’ve crashed into the planet long ago. But it’s a good scam they got going on, no wonder they don’t tell anypony the truth. Now, it is possible the planet is tidally locked, so they need to force it to rotate, but it would have to be a lot closer…they must have one hell of an ozone layer.

Finally, the pegasi, who are in charge of the weather. Which actually makes a lot of sense, I mean if we could do it, we so would. We could prevent hurricanes, tornadoes, major ice storms that can take out three provinces at once, and snowstorms during exam time. But this week it’s revealed that they don’t just control it, they need to create it. If they didn’t, the entire planet would likely become a wasteland. How the hell did life evolve on this rock!? Continue reading →

Dumbass and Dragons: “Dragon Quest” review

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Don’t ever forget, above all else, to know thyself. It’s a very important concept to remember. Know who you are and what you are capable of. I, for instance, know I am an atheist skeptic with a chip on my shoulder. I also have a natural skill in mathematics and I love Earl Grey tea and my cat when she’s not being a pain in the ass.

As part of this, it’s also important to continually try to learn new things about yourself. As they say: you never know until you try. I, for instance, recently discovered: I like coffee. I used to think I hated it. But that was probably because, back then, I was served shit coffee. Apparently, if it’s made right, I actually kinda like it. Funnily enough, I feel the same way about tea.

It is on this note that we begin this week’s episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Spike the dragon is a unique specimen. Like a man raised by wolves (I hear there are a few movies about that), he is fully absorbed in pony culture. So much so that he gets caught in a bit of an identity crisis. He’s a dragon, who doesn’t act like a dragon. So what exactly is he? Continue reading →

Time and the Poni: “It’s About Time” review

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Twilight is very very smart, yet crazy and stupid. What? You’re shocked!?

Turns out you can be smart and stupid at the same time. It may be hard to understand, but it’s true. You can have the entire Encyclopedia Britannica memorized, and still manage to fuck up every social encounter you make.

Twilight Sparkle is the epitome of this concept. Hell, it’s the premise of the whole series! Twilight Sparkle, genius, goes to Ponyville to learn basic social skills. Hell of a show!

Unfortunately, Twilight’s idiocy isn’t just limited to social interactions, but…well, basic logic and reasoning.

Thus, we are led into this week’s episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, where Twilight time travels. Continue reading →

Derpy Shot First!: The Derpy retcon and “Putting Your Hoof Down” review

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Okay, okay, okay. It turns out I’m prone to making mistakes. A month ago, I wrote about the Derpy controversy on My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, where Ponyville’s resident lazy-eyed pegasus, appeared to be getting retconned out of existence. In the end I determined that despite the fears of the fans, there probably wasn’t much to worry about.

Turns out I might have been wrong on that. Continue reading →

Bullshit in Disguise

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So, anyone who regularly follows my blog will no doubt notice that in recent months I’ve written exclusively about My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. So, to avoid the reputation that this is a one note pony blog, I’ve decided to change it up a bit by writing about another Hasbro property…oh shut up, it’s all I have right now.

You know what’s funny? The origins of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Bear with me on this. You see, the story goes that Lauren Faust was trying to sell a show based on her Galaxy Girls IP, no I’m not exactly sure what it’s about, to Hasbro, they turned her down but made her a different offer.

You see recently they’ve had great success in getting one mind to lead another one of their franchises and put their own style on it. Using a big name to drive it and turn it into something amazing. So they gave her the opportunity to mould My Little Pony into her own vision. This earlier franchise and the mind that drove it, inspiring Hasbro to give Faust the metaphorical reins of My Little Pony? Transformers and Michael Bay. Continue reading →

Friendship is Canon: The white Celestia doll and “A Friend in Deed” review

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Last week, I mentioned how perplexing it was that Hasbro hasn’t released a White Celestia. A toy that has been requested by every member of the fan community since day one. I figured it was the same reason they haven’t released a DVD box set: A crippling fear of money and success. Turns out I’m wrong. You see, a few hours after I posted that, the news hit the community: They are releasing a white Celestia!

The background gang's all here!

WOOHOO!!! I’m excited! Not just for the Celestia, but for the rest of the gang: A glow-in-the-dark Zecora; DJ Pon-3; and Nightmare Moon, which I thought was a completely unique mould, until I noticed a Celestia that they probably based it off of. There’s also everyone favourite bitch: the Great and Powerful Trixie, and my personal favourite: Heartstrings…or Lyra, if you prefer. Continue reading →

Love is a Poison

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One of the biggest activities among major fan communities is “shipping.” That is, the pairing of two characters in a relationship. I remember back in the day, my first exposure to this was through Harry Potter. I loved the idea of Harry getting together with Hermione. It only made sense to me. So much so that I got pissed and stopped reading halfway through book six, because the idea of Hermione ending up with Ron sickened me.

Perhaps I got stuck in my own dogma. I’m just bothered by the fact that the supposed ‘smart girl’ ended up with the most incompetent character in the book. Seriously, what does Ron have going for him? He’s good at chess!? That’s hardly a practical skill.

Um…where was I? Oh, yes, shipping. Every fan community does it, to a certain extent, and of course the fans of My Little Pony are no different. Except for the fact that the show has a majority female cast, therefore most of the “shipping” is of a homosexual nature. Nothing wrong with that. Unless you’re a knee jerk religious fundamentalist, in which case, this kid had the right idea: Continue reading →