Category Archives: Reviews

Batman Retires

Posted by BlackWidower on

The first two films in Nolan’s Batman trilogy were bizarre, dark, and fun. We got to see some interesting villains, some fantastic set-design, some exciting fight sequences, some compelling storytelling, and some fascinating ideas.

Why would someone dress as a bat, and beat up street thugs? What kind of training would he need? What kind of equipment would he need? How could he do it?

These are all easily addressed in the films. And thanks to Nolan’s commitment to realism, the entire idea of Batman seems much more plausible, and in turn, much more compelling.

Sadly, by the time the third film rolled around, it seems the well ran dry for interesting villains, fantastic set-design, exciting fight sequences, compelling storytelling, and fascinating ideas. Because while the third film does maintain the realism, themes, and characters of its predecessors. It’s boring as hell. Continue reading →

Batman Resurges

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Batman, as a concept, isn’t very realistic. But in 2005, Christopher Nolan tried to change that with Batman Begins. He gave the character a logical origin story, and even explained where all of his gear comes from. A man, trained in ninjutsu, inspired by the death of his parents, and with billions of dollars at his disposal, takes down criminals with a persona mirroring his greatest fear: Bats.

It’s a little ridiculous, granted. But it’s a nice attempt. And while the whole thing seems unlikely, it’s also plausible.

The first film had a bit of a sci-fi element, with the introduction of the Fear Gas, and some of Batman’s gear. I’m pretty sure memory cloth doesn’t actually exist. But nonetheless these elements didn’t seem too ridiculous, or too far outside the realm of possibility. Unlike the Burton series, with the magic automated homing Batarang.

Okay, now you're just fucking with us.

In fact, you know what this reminds me of? James Bond. Now, I’ll admit I haven’t seen every film, because… fuck that. But every film I saw always had the scene in the MI-6 headquarters, where Q introduces 007 to all his gadgets. These were always great scenes. He not only introduces all the gadgets and show what they do, but often explains how they work. Like the invisible car; it has a camera on one side, and the image is projected on the other. It’s pretty cool, even though we actually know that it wouldn’t work since people have tried that and it didn’t. But it’s still pretty cool.

Anyway, in the new Batman films, Morgan Freeman is basically Batman’s Q. And that’s the greatest thing about these films; The fact that even though the gadgets are a bit fantastic, they still feel real, or at least on the cutting-edge. And it’s all thanks to Morgan Freeman, as he gives James Bat his load out. Only instead of a BMW, he gets a tank.

The sci-fi elements in Batman Begins even carried over into the design of Gotham city. Specifically, the designs of the Narrows, the monorail, and Wayne Tower.

I touched on this last time.

They make me think of the classic German expressionist film, Metropolis. (Admittedly, I still have to see that film.) It gives a bit of a how-the-past-thought-the-future-would-look feel. But this film takes place in the present day (I think), and we don’t design buildings like that. Though I wish we did.

Nonetheless, as amazing as the designs are in Batman Begins. For the sequel, Christopher Nolan decided to scrap all of that. Wayne Tower is redesigned into a generic skyscraper, and the monorail is gone. And I think, because of this, the first film had a much better aesthetic. However, that doesn’t really matter, because the second film had a much better everything else. Continue reading →

Batman Reboots

Posted by BlackWidower on

The biggest, and most interesting thing about Batman is that despite his ‘superhero’ label; he has no superpowers. He’s just a guy with a lot of gear, fighting criminals. Because of this, he is also one of the most iconic superheroes in history.

I’ve talked about his history before. How his properties have fluctuated in tone, between comic and cheesy, to dark and bitter, and how I approve of both. However, it seems Batman’s most popular portrayals have taken the latter tone over the former.

For some bizarre reason, people, particularly Batman’s most vocal fans, have this knee-jerk desire to insist that Batman be taken seriously. See, they’re forgetting that he’s a superhero, a fantasy character. His closest allies include an Amazon with magical powers, an invincible alien with super strength and x-ray vision, and a fighter pilot with a ring that can conjure any object he wants. His most prevalent enemies include a woman who’s half plant, a seven-hundred-year-old immortal, and a man who can only survive at sub-zero temperatures. Yes, this is a franchise that is begging to be taken seriously.

The first four Batman films did fluctuate in tone, but even the dark and ‘serious’ ones floated on the border near fantasy and absurdity. After all, we have Catwoman coming back from the dead, and the Joker managing to create a toxin that makes people laugh to death.

Anyone who tries to take Batman seriously is obviously fighting a losing battle. Or at least they were, until 2005, when the Batman film franchise was given a fresh coat of paint under the direction of legendary filmmaker, Christopher Nolan. But this time, things were different. This time, Nolan got the franchise to strive for realism… and oddly enough, it worked. Continue reading →

Adventures in Pet Sitting: “Just for Sidekicks” review

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I think Spike may be my favourite character on My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.

Recent episodes aside, he’s shown himself to be reliable and trustworthy. If a little oblivious. He cares for those around him, and is always willing to help.

But of course he’s still a dragon, which comes with its own problems. Dragon instincts don’t fly well with the society in which Spike currently resides. Immense greed, an overzealous rigidity to a moral code, and a single-minded hunger for gems can cause quite a bit of conflict when surrounded by those who don’t have the same mentality.

What is a dragon to do?

Well, you try to get by the best you can. But obviously it’s not easy to go against your instincts and basic nature… though it would be nice if he actually tried. I bring this up because on this week’s episode, he doesn’t… at all. Continue reading →

Reforming Chaos: “Keep Calm and Flutter On” review

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Ideally, the primary purpose of prison is to rehabilitate and reform criminals so they can one day reenter society. Or at least, that’s the idea. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always work out. Often, criminals are released, only to re-offend, somewhere down the line. Even if they seem to have turned over a new leaf.

It’s a sad fact of the criminal justice system. That sometimes, despite our best efforts, some people just can’t be rehabilitated. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try. There’s always a chance that even the most hardened criminals can learn how to behave in the outside world. They can learn that it’s wrong to rob, rape and kill. And this week on My Little Pony, Princess Celestia relies on that idea when she releases Discord from his stone prison. Continue reading →

Non-transferable Skills: “Spike at Your Service” review

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If you have a job, I must issue you an applause. It must be nice to work, have something to do, and not worry about money too much. I used to have a job, however briefly. Those six weeks I’ve spent working retail I certainly enjoyed, and I wish I could go back, but that’s not happening. I’ve actually spent most of my adult life (since graduating college) unemployed. It’s depressing.

I’d understand if no one wants to give me a break and a chance to prove myself. But I already proved myself, and I think I did a good job…that is, if you ignore my last day, which I shall. So why can’t I get a job? I have the skills, I know modern point-of-sale systems, I know how to sell. Just recently I was at the local pharmacy, and the cashier didn’t know how to use a gift card. Apparently it was her second day, and her trainer was occupied. So, I walked her through it. I knew exactly what to do, just by looking at the screen.

I never lost these skills, and I never will. I can’t! In spite of the fact that I don’t apply them in my daily life today.

Which is why I find the latest episode of My Little Pony so odd, as young Spike forgets every skill he’s ever had, the very moment he starts to work for Applejack. Continue reading →

Apple Family Development: “Apple Family Reunion” review

Posted by BlackWidower on

Well, it’s that time of year again. The time where we drop what we’re doing and cross the country (or maybe just the city), to join our friends and family for some joyous holiday celebrations.

I guess most people enjoy spending time with family…I don’t. They’re annoying, insipid, and any time I spend with them, my outlook can be best described as: begrudged. I’d rather spend time with people I actually care about: My friends, or the internet.

For the most part, any special occasion or event is just an excuse to spend time with the people you love: friends and/or family. The events themselves don’t matter.

No one really cares about Christmas…not really. They care about giving/receiving gifts; and spending time with loved ones, talking, catching up, and maybe bonding through a few casual games.

Once you get a bunch of people together in the same room, they tend to make their own fun. You don’t need to plan anything in order for people to have a good time. Bring some food, drinks, maybe some music, and you’re set.

Unfortunately, not everyone realizes this. Many parent try to schedule their kids lives down to the minute. Others plan social events with so much detail, that no one gets any time to sit down, relax and do their own thing.

Which leads me perfectly into this week’s episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, as Applejack organizes this year’s Apple Family Reunion and, as expected, completely messes it up. Continue reading →

The Wonderbolt Test: “Wonderbolt Academy” review

Posted by BlackWidower on

In order to be successful in life, one must first understand what success means to them.

For me, this is easy: I want to become a published novelist. For others it might involve making a shitload of money, or winning some award. But there’s always something they need to aspire to.

Once that’s done, you must then understand how far you’re willing to go.

We all have our limits, things we simply won’t do no matter what the consequences, or what we may get out of it.

Okay, that’s not entirely true. Not everyone has those boundaries. In fact, some don’t have any boundaries. These people are known as psychopaths, and on this week’s episode of My Little Pony, we learn they also exist in Equestria. Continue reading →